For anyone that knows me well, they hear “not with that attitude” come out of my mouth regularly. I’m sure it gets annoying. But once it resonates—and it does—their lives change.
So what do I mean when I say “not with that attitude”—well, it's always in response to someone saying they‘ll never do something or they can’t accomplish what they hope to. And they’re probably right. If someone tells themself they can’t before they even start—what do you expect to happen?
Some may claim they’re really self-aware and understand their limits—that’s fine.
But 92% of the time, I’m calling bullshit.
It’s because I care.
My thoughts on the matter go a little something like this:
Let’s use the name John for this example.
John is playing around with the idea of running a marathon. Some of his coworkers recently finished one, so it’s on his mind. If John asks himself “Hey, I wonder if I could do that?” and his next thought is “HA no F - ing wayyy,” odds are he will never do it. He told himself “No” before even trying.
This isn’t to say John is wrong. He might be right on the money. He may never be able to run a marathon. But if it’s something he really wants to do, something he’s been thinking about for a long time—how is telling himself he can’t do it any help whatsoever?
It doesn’t help.
It gives him a reason not to try. “I can’t do this so I’m not even going to start.”
In most cases this mindset is a way of opting out and avoiding hard work, dedication, and failure.
I bet you know people who do this.
They want to be healthier “but could literally never give up bread.” The examples are endless. And in most cases, the person in question can absolutely accomplish what they’re talking about. But their mindset is holding them back. Their mindset is stopping them before they even start.
Hell—let’s use me as another example.
I’ve spent a lot of time coming up with business ideas around my education in exercise science. I’d think of something, play it out in my head, and eventually tell myself “that won’t work.” And back to the drawing board I went.
One day something clicked. I needed to TRY. Try something. Try anything. That’s the only way I would find out whether I was capable.
So here I am. I had an idea and now I’m acting on it.
Will it work?
Maybe not—but the only way I’ll know for sure is by giving it a shot and telling myself that I CAN.
Obviously, mindset doesn’t determine success—although it sure helps.
Change your mindset and you‘ll allow yourself to take a chance, allow yourself to fail.
You’ll learn what works and what doesn’t. What you’re good at and what you’re not.
So remember, if you think you can’t do something—Yeah, not with that attitude.